Lesbian does not mean “probably going to hit on you”.
Homosexual isn’t a horny caricature trying to fuck you.
Get over yourself.
Bisexual does not mean “wants to have a threeway.”
Pansexual doesn’t mean ‘fuck everything and anything’.
Asexual doesn’t mean “just never had sex with you.”
Heterosexual doesn’t mean ‘I’m an asshole and bi/trans/homophobic.’
So it’s my birthday and I’m opening gifts. I open the wrapped box from my uncle.
I open the box, and find a $50 gift card, yes? But wait, there’s Styrofoam. There’s more.
Then I remove the Styrofoam…
A FUCKING LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
mY UNCLE GOT ME A LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
bEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER
he then later gave me the legs.
LEGO LEGOLAS’ LEGO LEGS
Are you Luna Lovegood
Loony Luna Lovegood Lavishly Loving LEGO Legolas’s LEGO Legs